Okay, I am frustrated. I am wondering why it is some people can grow down. It's the mysterious case of all the men in my life, play on that B.Pitt movie. Why is it that men think I am waiting for them to sweep in and save me? Seriously, if I needed to be saved I would not be counting on your irrational, unpredictable, asses! Believe that.
Now it's time for the what had happened was. I was dating this guy for a few months or so. We were dating without titles, both realizing we weren't ready for a relationship. He was pretty fresh out of a relationship, and I'm just not ready for the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing yet. Early on I realized we weren't compatible. He was dating me for kindness and sex, and I was dating him for recreation. We didn't have thought provoking conversations, mind blowing intercourse, or a general great time. It was what it was, two people who enjoyed each other just enough to not walk away from each other. Then he went crazy. It was very unfortunate. He started showing most of his ass, and I got over it! We had a quiet, adult, discussion. He had grown on me enough that I didn't want to lose him. Then he showed his ass again. I was done, not really. We took a break, and when I was over my part of the break I tried to call him. No answer. I thought he was probably still upset. In our disagreements I told him I was no longer interested in sleeping with him. I just wanted to focus on redefining our friendship and nothing more. He didn't like it, but seriously, what could he do? Absolutely nothing. So anyway days, a week, whatever after I wrote his ass off as a mistake never to be mentioned again, he calls. He leaves me a message about how he's met someone, and I just don't fit in his life anymore. Huh? I was irrate. I'm not trying to date you. I don't want your sex. I don't need you in my life, BUT that's my decision to make. I'd already written your tired ass off, why are your coming around now? Anyway though screw you! I was there when you were shit out of luck, feeling down in the dumps, and wondering what life would be like without you. I fed you when you were hungry, once, but still I did. I was your friend. You shit on me, you ridiculous moron. I break this, you don't. So I called, showed my whole ass, adultlike using big words. Then I was done. I can't believe this type of behavior comes from adults!? It's like going into a women's bathroom and it looks as if it's been used by potty training little boys. That kind of stuff confuses me terribly!
Then boy 2. Yes, I had double drama today. I text a boy I'd been crushing on. He immediately though crush meant date you. NO! I don't date my crushes because I build you up higher than you can reach. So he listed the many reasons why I want him, but shouldn't have him. I'll be taken advantage of, hurt, devestated. Huh? You don't have any great possessions I should be chasing after. Cute, you are. Soul stirring, you are not. Listen fella, you just killed my crush.
If it wasn't for my serious attraction to them, I would be done with boys. They really are icky, mentally at least.
Friday, December 12, 2008
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