Monday, March 16, 2009

Soul mate, seriously?

Soul mate. What does this really mean? There's supposedly one person out there in the world that's perfect for me. This news is depressing. I live in Texas. What if my soul mate just boarded a plane to London for the next fiftyleven years? Or is fighting in Iraq? Or is happily running a ranch somewhere North of right here right now? I just think this soul mate crap could be devastating. If there's any truth to this, it is devastating. Because if there's just one person out there for me, we may not be scheduled to meet for 30 years. So, I'm supposed to be single and in waiting for the next however long? Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying the freedom single is allowing me today, but this may be a lonely life tomorrow. I don't want to do this forever. I just want to do this until I get everything else in life all lined out.

Bringing about another point, you cannot want for something you cannot offer. Example, I had a rule that I didn't date men with children, until I had a child. Now that I have and adore my own child, I can merely put a limit on number, but not on having at least one child. You can't not ask something of someone that you aren't willing to either provide or can live up to yourself. I want my next relationship to be with a man who is financially independent and stable. Someone who has there life mapped out for the next 20 or so years. I want a man who has clear obtainable goals and a possibility wish list. I want emotionally available, grounded, trustworthy, and balanced. I am accomplished in some, but not all. I'm working on some, but not all. Hell, some stuff is just sitting comfortably on the back burner. Because of this, I cannot force a man to be all of the things I want him to be. To date me you have to be equal to me or greater. I refuse to take care of anyone other than my son. And, I make sure I look at this as a vice versa situation.

So soul mates could be ideal, if I can control it. If he can be right on time, when I specify the time, I'm all in. Since it doesn't work like that, I'm going to file this one with Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny until I'm proven wrong.

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